Sunday, November 6, 2011

A New Normal

I've sat down to write this blog entry three times. I've been working on it in my head as well. I want this to be a funny entry, because there is some humor to losing your hair. The other side of that coin is the sadness. Sad that I even got cancer. Sad that I have to deal with chemo. Sad that I'm dealing with chemo in an era where it still means you lose all your hair. Sad that I am losing my hair. I've always been a bit vain about my hair. I have really nice hair. I get told this all the time. In fact, a man in Fiji once told me it was my one beauty. I am exactly like Jo from Little Women (that one is for you Jane).

Baldness is not something I ever thought would be a part of my life and certainly not at 30. However, I have had to and will continue to face some hard truths in the coming weeks and years and one of them is this: for the near future, I will be bald, and I mean "Mr. Clean" Bald.

I had been hoping to get a few more days out of my hair but on Saturday it became apparent that I was in denial. From the beginning I told Paul that he might need to be the voice of reason when it came to my hair. While I didn't want to shave my head, I also didn't want to be that lady whose hair looks TERRIBLE but no one has the heart to tell her. Besides, what had started as a hair loss trickle had turned into a mass exodus. You could literally grab handfuls of my hair.

So after a few tears and some self pity we busted out the clippers. As luck would have it, Paul is rather an expert at shaving heads. First step - create a Mohawk (or as my Mohawk friend would say, a fauhawk - he firmly believes the only real Mohawks are the ones on top of Mohwak people). I digress... here, look at me:

Then Paul did this to my head:

Frankly, I don't think I've ever looked better. But I worried about how people at work might react. So, off with the rest. Before the great unveiling I would like to point out a few things about being bald.

1. I can NOT stop touching and rubbing my head. Or picking out the remaining hairs.
2. Hair is an excellent insulator. My head is cold all the time now. I'm slowly working my way up to full time baldness but usually I'm rocking a scarf or hat. In part because I get stared at less when the dome is covered but also because it would be damn cold not to.
3. I think I can handle 6 months of this, but I'm hoping my hair comes back in faster than that.

Now, for the new bald Laura:

I think that this looks okay. I'm not saying I want to commit to this as a real hair style or anything, but I can rock the bald look. Well, mostly. And now, in parting, because no hair loss blog entry would be complete without a fake moustache picture, I give you....The Three Luigis!


  1. the three luigis really complete the experience. it would be really sad if you didn't take advantage of that.
    Take comfort in the fact that you have a lovely shaped head and it is not weird or lumpy. Also, start up your hat collection so you don't catch a cold, tis the season for adorable toques!

  2. I couldn't help but shed a single tear over this. I feel like losing the hair somehow makes it all really real, as you said. But - you do look pretty awesome as a baldie. I am glad Paul is there to have a twinners haircut with you, and I hope you realize the irony about Jo's one beauty because she grew up right and turned out to have such a deep and amazing character. Also, you have a beautiful everything else, so it's only one of your beauties, and hopefully it will be back soon.
    I miss you, let's chat.

  3. Holy moley you looking frickin awesome bald! You really do. I'm not just saying that. Luuuuuuckyyyyyyyyy.


    PS Ok, the cancer part - not lucky, but looking beautiful bald - lucky. And now, good to know. Just in case you ever want to voluntarily rock the look in the future.

  4. 1) At least you have a nicely shaped head.

    2) That second look is called a "Chelsea" I believe.

    3) You would make an awesome punk.

    4) Hope you are feeling okay. Thinking about you lots and sending good thoughts your way :0)

  5. Laura, you will always be beautiful inside and out. You inspire me everyday, much love xxox