I've been thinking about the blog hiatus, in light of some of the things that people have said to me. The one that resonated most was the idea that the blog should go on, if only to show that there is life after cancer (thanks Maegan). I'm not making any promises about how often I'll write, but perhaps a "hiatus" is too strong.
Besides, I did think of one more thing I could post about. Aside from worrying about every little ache and pain being something very bad (the internet and my mom say I shouldn't do that), my new obsession is my hair. Is it growing? I mean, logically, I know it is growing. But I live with this head every day, I see it every day, so I forget that it is changing. Also, patience is not one of my virtues, and I want style-able hair back. Now.
Paul and I were going to do a photo of the day to track progress, but soon that turned into a photo of the week and then a "hey, the camera is next to you, can you take a photo of my head" sort of thing. We have not been diligent. However, I do have some progress to show.
First, let's begin with where I started. At the time I thought I was looking pretty good, all things considered. And I guess that is still true. I just didn't realize how sick I looked. It was a gradual decline too, so I had time to get used to my new look, which I suppose is why I didn't think I looked THAT sick. Anyway, here is a photo from January 25th.
Besides, I did think of one more thing I could post about. Aside from worrying about every little ache and pain being something very bad (the internet and my mom say I shouldn't do that), my new obsession is my hair. Is it growing? I mean, logically, I know it is growing. But I live with this head every day, I see it every day, so I forget that it is changing. Also, patience is not one of my virtues, and I want style-able hair back. Now.
Paul and I were going to do a photo of the day to track progress, but soon that turned into a photo of the week and then a "hey, the camera is next to you, can you take a photo of my head" sort of thing. We have not been diligent. However, I do have some progress to show.
First, let's begin with where I started. At the time I thought I was looking pretty good, all things considered. And I guess that is still true. I just didn't realize how sick I looked. It was a gradual decline too, so I had time to get used to my new look, which I suppose is why I didn't think I looked THAT sick. Anyway, here is a photo from January 25th.
You will note my obvious baldness, though at this point I was staring to sprout a bit. Yes, I was actually balder than this, if you can believe that. Also, at that point my eyebrows were actually just shadows formed by the muscles that make them move and I had no eyelashes. Well, I might have had three eyelashes. Some did hang on to the bitter end, bless them!
So, fast forward about 2 months, give or take a few days to....
And one from the front:
I think I look considerably better (I'm also wearing makeup in these later photos which is cheating, I know). Now, I'm not saying I'm keeping this look but I don't hate it. It is pretty much the easiest hairstyle I've ever had, so there is that. I'm still anxious for a bit more length but I've been going out sans wig for about 4 weeks now.
I point this out so that if anyone out there is reading this and wondering what their hair future is, this might be a glimpse of it. I was anxious to stop wearing a wig as it made me feel like a big old liar pants. I'm pretty sure no one could tell but I was always worrying that they would notice. At least this is honest, even if it is very short! Besides, wigs are not comfortable. At least, mine wasn't. I really do prefer this, though I wouldn't mind a few more inches. All in good time, I suppose.
You look GOR-GEOUS! Love this look for you! Keep the photos coming. I'm sure you'll have lots of great looks as it grows out.
ReplyDeleteYou and your lustrous black hair! You look stylish and carefree with this hair. FACT.
ReplyDeleteMy hair has no future, but mine left way before cancer came. However, hair suits you better than me and there's already enough bald people out there anyways.
ReplyDeleteIn my head I'm going to write you a big long email. for now this will have to do.
I haven't "enjoyed" a single blog post you've written, because the topic isn't enjoyable. Rather I've gone from feeling very, so very alone in my cancer journey (even though I haven't been alone) to being comforted that I have a friend out there going through this in her own way - "someone else knows!". I'm glad you have written, your words have brought me tears of hope, courage and smiles.
Personally, I enjoyed taking a hiatus writing from writing mine, maybe you'll enjoy one too.
if you do a daily photo you can make one of those awesome time-lapse videos.
ReplyDeleteThank you so much for your bravery and your photo's. I just finished chemo and yours are the most hopeful pic's I've seen yet. I would give anything to have that much hair in 2 months. I'll pray for yours to grow fast. Throw one out there to the universe for me too please!
ReplyDeleteAbsolutely love your hair - i too am recovering from chemo which finished on the 2nd week of January this year 2013. My hair is coming back slowly but surely. i was lucky in a sense that my hair started to grow before chemo finished. Cant wait to get out there without my "wig".
ReplyDelete