Thursday, August 30, 2012

An Ode to Jane

Those of you who read this blog regularly have probably noticed the commenting presence of my good friend Jane. Those of you who know me well know what an important part she has played in my life. I've said it here many times, when it comes to friends and family, I have been abundantly blessed. I hope I have the friends I deserve, but often I think they are better than I deserve. This is especially true when it comes to her.

Maybe it is because it feels like it has been so long since I've seen her and had real, quality time with her, but she is very much on my mind these days. I've been lucky to have some other close friends come through town recently and having them here helped scratch that itch but with her, it has been awhile. We had a rushed visit when I was home after my grandmother passed away, but I long for the days of our childhood and teens, when our time together was never-ending. When we talked about nothing and everything, amused mostly ourselves and generally stayed out of trouble.

It is Jane (aside from my immediate family) who has been in closest contact with me throughout this cancer odyssey. I don't know how she managed but I've felt her presence the most in the last year, even though she is 8000 kilometers away. She was one of the very few people I told before I got the actual news - when I was still in limbo. She has been there for the best days of my life and for some of the darkest.

She recently shared an article about female friendships. So much of what we see and hear about female friendships focuses on women who are not supportive of other women, who are jealous and mean spirited. This has never been my experience. I have always found women to laugh and share with, to prop me up and make me better. If I ever have a daughter, I hope she can have her own Jane.

Jane, who sent me a beautiful card, licorice tea and some nibs at a time when it was the perfect gift. Jane, who is always there to talk about whatever and for however long I need. Jane, who was sadder about my hair loss than even me. Jane, who even when she doesn't share my beliefs or understand them, is willing to put her own on hold and just be there for me. Jane, who is amazing.


  1. I feel the same as you Laura - my female friendships have always been supportive and life-giving. So glad to count you as one of those wonderful friends.
    - Bridget

  2. Laura! You made me cry. This is pretty much the nicest thing anyone has ever said about me.
    I honestly am having a hard time thinking of what I could say that would express how fortunate I consider myself to have you in my life. You dropped everything to be with me through the darkest day of my life too; something I often wonder if I could ever possibly repay or reciprocate, even though, being the person you are, you would never ask it of me.
    We are blessed to have found each other and grown together.
    Here's to you and me - like Anne and Diana we are truly "bosom" companions. (Oh yeah, that just happened.)
    Love and miss,

  3. I remember you telling me of the great Jane way back when. I have also noticed her supportiveness (through your blogs) and am so grateful you've had someone like her, who's always seemed to be there, no matter what.

    'Friends come and go, but for the precious few we should hold onto'